Am I the only one out there that notices how angry and unforgiving we as a society have gotten?  It seems like we are at a point where you are either friends with someone, or you are mortal enemies with them.  No longer, it seems, do we live in a world where we can all just exist together agreeing to disagree.  It’s all about immediate reactions and snap judgments.  Can we all just take a moment?  

We live in a world where our beliefs can easily be validated by a few clicks of the keyboard.  No matter how extreme, there will be others out there that share our same rally cry.   Any sort of conflicting beliefs can literally be ‘unfollowed,’ ‘blocked,’ or ‘unsubscribed’ from seeing. Created is a world that only speaks to our own truths no matter what they are.  

Of course, life will remind us that there are as many opinions out there as there are people walking the earth, and many of them will not align with our own.  When reminded of this, many of us are incapable of processing the information; having lived so long in a narrow narrative of what is ‘right.’ Our (self-selected) news feeds have led us to believe that our way of thinking is the only way…  

What?!?!  You’re trying to tell me now that coconut oil is bad for us?  We have always agreed that coconut oil is good for us! That’s simply not true!  I can pull up 10,000 news articles that state that coconut oil is going to save civilization from the looming zombie apocalypse.  How dare you suggest otherwise?!? You will now be unfriended, blocked and I will make it my life’s work to make sure you pay for turning on me and suggesting such a thing!    

Of course, I’m being silly, but you get the idea.  Coconut oil could literally be anything.  What does all this resentment and anger get us?  

I have seen (now more than ever) friendships torn apart because of disagreements over what can inevitably be melted down to a difference of opinion. Bridges burned over (basically) coconut oil.  Instead of opening our minds, we have hypnotized ourselves into believing that our ‘way’ is the only ‘way’ and that if someone isn’t believing what we believe, they are against us.  We would rather literally turn our backs on someone than hear them out.   

We get it, Andrea, but what does this have to do with forgiveness and this article isn’t funny at all?   I know. I always write (for the three people out there that read it) funny articles about fitness as that is mostly my world; fitness, and you know… also, this is a gym newsletter, but really I just write what’s on my mind at the time and this has been on my mind #buzzkill. 

Believe that there will come a time when someone else’s anger will show up on your front door and the only thing you may have done to invite it is live your life.  It will mess with you mentally, and your first instinct will be to reply with anger.  It’s only natural.   I would urge you to take a moment.  Even if you have a good excuse to get angry, remember that anger is a disease and it’s the other person’s and not yours.  You can decide to catch it from them or reject it and forgive. 

As corny as it sounds, forgiveness is a gift you give yourself.  It isn’t easy, and you may struggle with it at first, but forgiving someone isn’t excusing their actions.  It isn’t not holding them accountable for something they may have done to you.  It simply means, not fighting anger with more anger.

If you do find yourself struggling know it’s only because you are human.  Take a moment and realize that just because someone invites you to a party, doesn’t mean you have to accept the invitation.  Take all of the feelings and bring them to the gym.  Work through your process of forgiveness by working out your body, mind, and soul.  P90X for the body, Yoga for the mind and Shakin’ It for the soul.  Rinse and repeat as necessary.  

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Andrea Kay

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